As opposed to procrastination. Two big old five syllable words, but procrastination is the one that comes naturally. For those of us blessed with that gift. But prognostication seems a bit more challenging for me. Even predicting my own actions – like when I might write the next post – seems beyond my grasp. And I’m left contemplating arguments like the meaning of “a few”. I say I’ll post every few days, and now it’s been nine. I’ve always believed that nine is several, not a few, and I just can’t abandon that belief now. Better to abandon trying to predict me. Discipline deficiency syndrome? But in my own defense, much of this delay is directly attributable to my slowly coming to grips with an impending death. Not of any person, but of my laptop. If it were a person, it would be the one with whom I have spent the most time over the last seven years. By far. All of those hours designing structures and systems and 3D models that carry me inside of my work. Writing and planning and creating and editing… all on this now decrepit old Dell laptop. Respected clients have started to make fun of me for it. She can still push out a complex 3D model in AutoCad as my most trusted and powerful tool, but she now takes a really long time to boot up. Like fifteen minutes. And sometimes she just stops dead in her tracks, like she forgot what she was doing. I have to hard power her down and try again. Sometimes several times. And recently, she lost a sense altogether. No sound. No way. The IT guys gave it several valiant attempts, but she seems incapable of recognizing her own sound card or reloading the drivers. It’s really sad. I think she’s trying to say that she’s done; that I can no longer procrastinate. Or not for much longer, anyway. She’s been so sick over the last few weeks, it’s making it easier for me now to accept the inevitable truth. To let her go, and move on. To get a fresh new partner, one that DOES have an HDMI port, and then start down that path of loading all of the software… learning how to work with her. Or will the next one be a dude? The future is not mine to tell. Right… so the blog is generally supposed to have something to do with Lisa. All reports are positive. She continues to make great progress. Full of energy, engaging, she even drives differently. V2 was like riding with your grandma… easy as we go, no strategy, and soo slow. Lisa V3, however, is an aggressive but good driver, like V1 was. She’s rocking on down the road, changing lanes, passing… keeping her passengers attentive to the road; knuckles a little white. Fun stuff! Jake has remarked about it – another facet of his Mom that he is seeing for the first time. That said, there are still some gaps. They are fewer and farther between, but there are those moments when Lisa says or does something that is totally disconnected – like you can almost hear the sparking sound of a mental short circuit. But now understood. A shared laugh, a correction, and continued healing. Lisa’s three month post-op appointment with the neurosurgeon is December 5, and she’s anxious to see her new MRI. Me too. Please do continue to pray for Lisa, for her recovery to be complete. And if you don’t mind, when you’re done with that throw in one for me – key word: discipline.
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AuthorWritten by David, with review and approval by Lisa before posting Archives
January 2018
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